Tuesday, January 16, 2018

Some profound sense


Money is the root of all evil. It’s also the root of all good stories, so hooray for money.

Duderonomy, Book 2, Verse 2

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When discussing a matter of grave importance, or even of trifling idiocy, always make sure to employ expletives as much as possible to prove your heartfelt honesty and conviction. To ensure your dudeness, all out-of-control, manic discussions should be followed with entreaties to “just take it easy, man.”

Duderonomy, Book 1, Verse 5

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If you are a man of modest means and charisma and a rich, beautiful woman wants to have sex with you, don’t question her motives until after the act is over.

Duderonomy, Book 4, Verse 1